TwoFrench.../...TheHistory of.../...
June, 19th 2008 05:56 AM

Two French paratroopers were sent to the SAS for
special training. After the first day they met up in
the bar.
'Ah, Pierre ,' asks one, ' 'ow 'av you been doing?'
'Merde!' answers Pierre . 'I 'av 'ad a mos' terrible
day. Terrible! At seex zis morning I was woken by
zis beeg 'airy sergeant. 'E dragged me out of bed
and on to ze parade ground.'
'And zen what 'appened?' inquires his mate. 'I weel
tell you what 'appened! 'E made me climb urp zis
silly leetle platform five feet off ze ground and
zen 'e said 'Jurmp!'.' ''And did you jurmp?' asks
his mate. 'I did not. I told 'im - 'I am a French
paratrooper. I do not jurmp five feet. It is beneass
my dignity.'
'And zen what 'appened?' asks his mate. 'Zen 'e made
me climb up zis silly leetle platform ten feet off
ze ground, and 'e said 'Jurmp!'.' 'And did you
jurmp?' asks his mate. 'I did not. I told 'im - 'I
am a French paratrooper. It is beneass my dignity to
jurmp ten feet.'
'What 'appened zen?' asks his mate. 'Zen 'e made me
climb urp zis rickety platform a 'undred feet above
ze  parade ground. 'E undid 'is trousers, took out
zis enormous willy, and 'e said: 'If you do not
jurmp, I am going to stick zis right urp your
burm.'.' 'Ooooh!' says his mate. 'And did you
jurmp?'
'A leetle, at ze beginning.'

 

 

The History of the Middle Finger
Well, now......here's something I never knew before, and now that I know it, I feel compelled to send it on to my more intelligent friends in the hope that they, too, will feel edified. Isn't history more fun when you know something about it?
Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory over the English, proposed to cut off the middle finger of all captured English soldiers. Without the middle finger it would be impossible to draw the renowned English longbow and therefore they would be incapable of fighting in the future. This famous English longbow was made of the native English Yew tree, and the act of drawing the longbow was known as 'plucking the yew' (or 'pluck yew').
Much to the bewilderment of the French, the English won a major upset and began mocking the French by waving their middle fingers at the defeated French, saying, See, we can still pluck yew! &n bsp;Since 'pluck yew' is rather difficult to say, the difficult consonant cluster at the beginning has gradually changed to a labiodentals fricative F', and thus the words often used in conjunction with the one-finger-salute! It is also because of the pheasant feathers on the arrows used with the longbow that the symbolic gesture is known as 'giving the bird.'
IT IS STILL AN APPROPRIATE SALUTE TO THE FRENCH TODAY!


And yew thought yew knew every plucking thing ?

 

 

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