.../...The sensitive man.../...grammar enthusiasts.../...
February, 12th 2009 05:56 AM

The Sensitive Man
A woman meets a man in a bar.
They talk; they connect; they end
up leaving together.

They get back to his place
and he shows her around his
apartment.


She notices that one wall of his
bedroom is completely filled with soft, sweet,
cuddly teddy bears. 

There are three shelves in the
bedroom, with hundreds and hundreds of cute,
cuddly teddy bears carefully placed
in rows, covering the entire wall!

It was obvious that he had taken
quite some time to lovingly arrange them and she was immediately touched
by the amount of thought he had
put into organizing the display.


There were small bears all along
the bottom shelf, medium-sized bears covering the
length of the middle shelf, and huge, enormous bears running
all the way along the top shelf.


She found it strange for an
obviously masculine guy to have such a large collection of
Teddy Bears, She is quite impressed by his
sensitive side, but doesn't mention this to him. 


They share a bottle of wine and
continue talking and, after awhile, she finds herself
thinking, 'Oh my God! Maybe, this guy
could be the one!


Maybe he could be the future
father of my children?'
 
She turns to him and kisses him
lightly on the lips 

He responds warmly.


They continue to kiss, the passion builds,
and he romantically lifts her in
his arms and carries her into his bedroom where they rip off each other's
clothes and make hot, steamy love. 


She is so overwhelmed that she
responds with more passion, more creativity, more heat than she
has ever known. 

After an intense, explosive night
of raw passion with this sensitive guy, they are lying there together in the afterglow.  


The woman rolls over, gently
strokes his chest and asks coyly, 'Well, how was it?' 


The guy gently smiles at her, strokes her cheek, looks deeply into her eyes, and says:  
 

'Help yourself to any prize

 


from the middle shelf'

 

GRAMMAR enthusiasts which point out everyday errors are much fewer interesting compared than normal people, according to researchers.

The Institute for Studies say people who write letters complaining about the use of 'your', 'you're' and 'youre' have less friends and are fewer able to socially mix.

Doctor Henry Brubaker, the institutes' head of grammar, says: "Words are very important. They convey meaning and emotion, but they can also be used to bore the tits off you.

"Take, for instance, the sentence; 'If there is one thing I really hate, it is bad grammar'.

"These words, placed in this precise order, can cause you either to walk away immediately or nod and say 'I completely agree'.

"Unfortunately, if you opt for the second response, it will then be met with the follow-up sentence, 'Surely you mean 'agree completely?'.

"At this point it is acceptable to walk away, perhaps with the accompanying use of the word 'prick'."

He added: "If anyone asks you what is wrong with William Shatner's speech at the beginning of Star Trek, remember that the correct response is to say, 'I am now going to kick you in the nuts, boldly'."

 

 

 

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