walk in the park
July, 27th 2011 16:58 PM

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The rugby bit:

Published 28.7.11

 A Walk In The Park

Tri-Nations

Australia 39 – 20 South Africa

Damned cold toes in the north of Blighty, which has nothing to do with this game.

 

Dog shit in the park too, as I noticed on the way home from the shop this morning, I don’t even live here and I cleaned up my shit, well, not mine, but the dog’s, and that wasn’t even my dog, just one I took for a walk, but that also has nothing to do with this game either… or does it?

 

No, I’m not suggesting the game was excrement, it went precisely as fool predicted, even down to the Boks fielding an experimental side of young bucks, which in all sense and purposes shall prevail for the whole tournament making this years Tri-Nations a somewhat warm up/ practice arena for the bigger picture some 10 weeks away.

 

Nor even the quality of play, which for the most was acceptable if not a delight to watch that is always the case with an international be it Fiji versus New Zealand, which we’ll get onto in a minute or Spain versus Romania, because at the end of the day it gets dark, and I’ll still be cleaning dog shit off my shoe from some mutts’ crack that is going to piss me off till the stench vapours from the memory.

 

Yet, on the paddock of Sydney, Australia took control of this game with a solid platform scrum-wise. A moderately low crowd of 52,788 were pleased with the 5-2 try count which opened from a 90 metre break from Cooper. The ball then hurtled wide following a breakdown and big fella Ben Alexander found himself on the end of an Elsom pass to score.

 

Not long after, Genia slipped away up the blindside, sped past to unassuming Bok front rowers and put Digby away for the Wallaby’s second.

 

Cooper was allowed to run again early in the second half, which was half the problem in the Boks defence Cooper fired a low ball for O’Connor to grab inches from the ground to finish the move.

 

If defence wasn’t quite up to scratch, vision was on song for the Aussies especially in Stephen Moore’s burst on a short ball off a maul and side-stepped a bemused defence to clock the try of the day.

 

Cooper was in action again to put away half his namesake in Ashley-, as the Boks kicked back latter in the second half with some kind of fight and a deserved two try haul from Chillibot Rapelle at close range and John Smit in the 76th minute, at… close range.

 

Let’s not knock either side here, it was entertaining rugby, and as good as the Genia/ Cooper combo looks, it’s yet to be finalised until their defence is tested on a more consistent basis, however, Smit did acknowledge the genius that is Genia, ‘He keeps guys busy and he forces defences to make decisions, so he’s a pretty good player.’

 

Rocky was ‘reasonably happy’ with the win, whilst Deano reiterated fool’s ideology on the basics in that he thought, ‘The set piece was good’, it ‘s yet inconclusive as to whether treading in shit in bare feet will warm the preverbal toes of expectancy – because lets face it - Samoa would have beaten the Boks on Saturday.

 

New Zealand 60- 14 Fiji

As it says on the tin, this game went according to plan. But a special mention must go to Fiji’s sturdy early second half performance which saw them come together and put the frighteners on the Blacks.

 

A couple of shaky moments in defence saw the Blacks regroup and only when Conrad Smith won the chase for a touch down following a canny kick from Slade did I recognise him (Conrad) for who he is, which has been bugging me for years, that 70’s hairstyle, the wayward chin – it’s Ben Stiller.

 

fool says:

The Kiwis will smash the Boks, even with four rested top flight players.

 

Some shorts:

*Jonah Lomu has aired his bemusement at England’s Black number, saying, like most comments, it’s ‘weird’. But then a flaw in his argument ripples through the furore of traditionalist as he said the All Blacks are the original and anyone else who dons black is an ‘imitator’, which may be so, but is of course complete bollocks, as we’ve already discussed with shirt colours of white, for example, donned by France, Scotland, USA and Fiji, and of course New Zealand, which makes fashion the nature of change, but let’s look more closely at Jonah’s angle and see it as a fashion statement, which is worrying when coming from the land of the long cloud which is about as far removed from the haute couture world as Conrad Smiths haircut. The debate continues.

 

*With 23 players left home due to ‘injury’ PdV found the supposed training camp set up with Rassie Erassamus was empty and the Bok stars had gone on holiday, PdV said, ‘there is always mischief everywhere.’

 

 

‘Mischief’

 

For the latest news ‘see’ crazy fool’s Radio Show – click on red icon, top left of home page.

 

Some competitions now: If you’d like to take part in fool’s rugby comps check out the comps & results page –win a prize! – I should probably check it myself, as I can’t remember what comps are up for grabs.

 

Send your team(s) to cf.crazyfool@gmail.com – argh yes, teams, that was it - teams.

 

end rugby here!

 

 

 

A willow the wisp of cricket now:

 


 

And now ladies and gentlemen a thribble on the light side:

 


 Cubans in the air

From not being able to remember the last Test we had to feast on, we were suddenly slapped with a belter of five days of pure unadulterated munchie-fun.

 

Day 1 saw Trott doing the bollocks, I thought of getting all poetic but what the hell, colloquial speaks volumes – it says so in the broadsheets.

 

At 58 not out he was dropped twice as England managed 127-2 at a rainy Lords. KP stuck with him on 32 and a major blow for India saw Zaheer Khan hobble from the field with a twanged hammy.

 

England made the most of the missing bowler and rattled 474-8 before declaring with 202* courtesy of the KP man.

 

Although dropped on 49, as Boycott put it, ‘most definitely out’ and dragged in Vaughan, Gower’s and Nichols affirmation of the TV debacle that the Indian’s demand of their refusal of Hawkeye let alone letting the Umpires make the decision which is so obviously clear, unlike this ramble.

 

And so Trott survived. Broad took 4-37 on Day 3 with the coveted scalp of Sach and England seemed to be in total control – roll on Day 4 where commentators Henry Blofeld and Phil Tuffnel amused themselves with passing aeroplanes that resembled cigars whilst England’s wickets skittled away to 81-5 and an Indian uprising was on the cards.

 

Enter Matt Prior and his 103* epitomised India’s Rahul Dravid previous 103* in round one, whom I’m sure plays kickball for Holland, then coupled with a Broad 3-78 and before we knew it England set the visitors a 458 target, which they duly accepted with 80-1 at the close of play.

 

Day 5 signed off this epic battle to the English with an all round bowling display that even Boycott credited with 9.5.

 

Jimmy took the only 5-fer for 65, but Broad could count himself unlucky for the crooked finger of Bowden stayed down on two occasions when it should have been bent.

 

Nevertheless, a collective effort from Tremlett, Swann, Jimmy and Broad saw off the masters of batting on a dead wicket for 269 and won by 196 runs – no matter where you’re from that was a great Test to watch – next up Trent Bridge.

 

In the snippets

*Steve Waugh has accepted the polygraph test will not be implemented to cage the crooks in cricket dues to its double-edged sword connotations for being damned if you do par-take and damned if you don’t and admitted it was pretty hairy, ‘It was nerve-wracking, but if you’re going to suggest using lie detectors tests, I thought it was right to take one myself.’

 

Steve says 56 payers a year report being approached by bent bookies, when asked if was ever, a crowd of dogs suddenly encircled him.

 

*35 year-old Aussie Damien Wright has taken the reigns of Kiwi bowling , as Steve Rixon and Craig McDermott have saddled into the Aussies camp as on the coaching staff, but I have nothing to say about this apart from didn’t McDermott once wear a wig and play for Liverpool.

 

It’s early now and… - I’m done

 

The team that likes roll mops and partying and belts and rum and temptations and feathers and Steve Finn and proverbs and coordinates and pigeons and tiddly winks and Jessie’s! And spin and the Beatles and Buddy Holly and side-show Bob and Ant and Dec and capes and japes and basketball and indoor cricket and psyche and a good rib-dig and loose ends and first balls and a good roasting, and triple tons and whoa-ha-ha’s and cooking and cradles and Yorkshire puddings…and 2010/11 Ashes, and the Gods

 

Till next week…

 


 

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