twas a grand slam
March, 23rd 2011 21:11 PM

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The rugby bit:

Published 24.3.11

 

Argh to be sure, ‘twas a grand slam

 

Scotland 21-8 Italy

By the time we located the correct telly in the pub Italy were up 5-3 thanks to a try from Andrea Masi, which to all sense and purposes sounds like a bird, as fool mentioned at the time,

 

‘sounds like a bird’.

 

However, it wasn’t long before Scotland hit back in a game fool cunningly knew they’d win because every time they got the ball coach Andy Robinson scratched his nuts and that’s a tell tale sign of apprehensive success.

 

It did the trick, as Nick De Luca went over for Scotland’s first try at Murrayfield since 2009. fool’s mate quickly pointed out that McClean who’d just come on for Italy didn’t sound Italian and fool told him he wasn’t but was an Aussie, no doubt borne from Dougie McLean’s folk ballad, ‘Caledonia’ circa 1979.

 

Speculation was found waning in De Luca’s heritage, which was quickly bolstered with an un convincing Mc de Luca of ye sleeping Roman influence circa sometime before Hadrian built his wall.

 

Nikki Walker then went over in the corner early in the second half and his infamously surname to befit any an old smelling sock was jostled with Finnish peculiarities that had had us all confused.

 

Nevertheless, Andy Robinson cleared his nuts and told us what it’s all about after having lost the previous 4 games explained,

 

‘That’s what we’re here for, to win games of rugby.’

 

Ireland 24 – 8 England

On Ireland’s turf England barely got the chance to touch the ball, let alone stand stubbornly proud in the Irish spot for anthems, set-piece or even their occasional flout of fancy.

 

Ireland bossed England in a first half performance that had all the hallmarks of a veteran bull explaining to a young-un how they could milk all the proverbial cows if they paced this tournament with experience and save their best for last.

 

In a flurry England’s bunnies were caught in the headlights by wolfhounds so quick out of the traps they didn’t stand a chance and were torn to pieces.

 

A proficient set-piece set up rapid movements along the backline that had England’s defence in disarray and before you knew it Bowe was in the corner for a try.

 

Ireland had the game already won however, after 15 minutes with a 9-0 boot win from Sexton that had the writing all over Aviva’s stands.

 

This was going to be a fired and long awaited for connected Irish performance – and by gum-golly-smack a leprechaun-gosh they gave it.

 

Following a few more punts over from Sexton and a couple of easy misses from Flood, Ireland were up 17-3.

 

Racing out of the second half blocks on 47th minute B.O’D snuck in the corner for their second and a tournament record with 25 - a comeback at this level looked highly improbable.

 

Although, a few minutes later England snuck one back through a Thompson intercept and by-jiminy can the big ugly bastard run.

 

From there on in England shuffled back to something like we’ve seen of late, but would it have New Zealand rattling? The players? – Yes - spectators… no.

 

But as Johnno said they’re a young side with huge potential and they’d just have to take it on the chin

 

‘We were beaten by a good team, an experienced team.’

 

‘Ireland are a savvy team, full of pride, and we’ve got what we’ve got – a team of good young players.’

 

Johnno was also quick to point out their flow of flair was only halted by their own mistakes when they gave the ball to Ireland when ever they seemed likely to do something with it. But that goes back to the old bull and young fella again and this field of intensity was too beckoning for success to mess with irregular composure.

 

B.O’D might be a worldly pain in the arse, but there’s no doubt he rallies his troops and they answered his call with glee on Saturday

 

‘We played a smart game, and they couldn’t live with us.’

 

‘We lost the 2nd half but to score 24 points against this team is an impressive innings.’ – And who wouldn’t use a cricket quip!

 

France 28-9 Wales

France restored pride if not some valour back into Lievremont’s cheeks. Wales were plying to pip England’s championship but needed a 27 point win – dominance in all areas from France made sure the taffy’s finished 4th and themselves 2nd.

 

Lional Nallet put the ball over the Welsh try line in the first half and again in the second thanks to a charged down clearance kick from Hook, which bobbled its way into the second row’s hands.

 

Hook then went into the bin for a dangerous tackle and Francois Clerc caught onto a Parra chip to seal the score.

 For Swifty...


Super 15’s:

Reds rubbed out the Rebels 53-3 with 7 tries. Boss McKenzie said his side are finally getting into their game but have a lot more up their sleeve – yeah ok, don’t get carried away Mc/ Cheetah’s beat Tah’s 23-3 now, that is something to get carried away by/ If you fancy another upset try out Stormers rampage of the Bulls 23-13… at Loftus – that’s not happened since 2003/ Sharks were hit by Chiefs 15-9 – jeez, it’s all happening/ Crusaders walloped Highlanders to go into 3rd on the table/ Blues climbed to 5th with a 41-17 drubbing over ‘Canes/ And the Force, the mighty Force slammed Lions 27-15 in Jo’burg for their first win of the season. In a damp game the forwards excelled, with the magic of O’Connor overriding the wet. His chip helped Nick Cumming over in the first half. Later when he burst clear the ball was recycled quickly for Cummings to grab his second and a Cameron Sheppard chip put Alfie Mafi through for the last 30metres to help the WA team home.

 

LV=Cup: Yes this week – final in fact and Gloucester picked up the first silverware of the season beating Newcastle 34-7.

 

Heineken Cup

The quarter’s in, ooh, April some time, are: Northampton play Ulster – Leinster v Leicester – Perpignan against Toulon and Biarritz versus Toulouse.

 

Aviva Premiership;

This late in the season – just as its hotting up…? – Na.

 

Magners: darned if I know me neither

 

Top 14: Ditto

 

fool says: Rebel’s’ll win!

 

Some shorts:

*Small Blacks magazine is due for its launch following the heavily successful Small Blacks TV – it’s a small magazine for small Kiwi’s.

 

*Meanwhile big Kiwi Justin Marshall has urged the NZRFU to bring back Robbie Deans after the world cup, as Kiwi-land isn’t long on coaching staff. However, it seems likely the ARU will step up their bid for the pragmatic coach and look to extend his contract by a couple of years. – Henry is rumoured to be going to Man U, whilst Fergie looks to step into the Blacks domain.

 

*Mike Tindall will be out for up to three months with ankle ligaments – seems like the Royal Family are pushing their wait around again! Remember when Princess Anne asked him to get his nose fixed for the wedding… he said no… and we know who the last person to say no was don’t we.

 

*Georgia picked up the 6N’s B comp with a 15-9 win over Russia. Other results were; Oaks (Romania) 64 slaughter of the Spanish Lions’s 8 and Lobos (Portugal) 46-24 win over Ukraine.

 

*Crusaders and Sharks at Twickenham this Sunday – they’re getting about more than fool’s Kitchen!

 

For the latest news ‘see’ crazy fool’s Radio Show – click on red icon, top left of home page.

 

Some competitions now: If you’d like to take part in fool’s rugby comps check out the comps & results page –win a prize! – I should probably check it myself, as I can’t remember what comps are up for grabs.

 

Send your team(s) to cf.crazyfool@gmail.com – argh yes, teams.

 

end rugby here!

 

 

 

Tapas & Bodega: bodega, oh baby when you dance like that… Sangria, mojito’s, plenty, plenty, plenty of wine and beer; Plus, The best Spanish cuisine in Saigon this side of Spain - Which is just to the right of Vietnam, and perhaps a little off centre of Phuket. Cracking live music too.

 

A willow the wisp of cricket now:

 

 

And now ladies and gentlemen a thribble on the light side:

 

 

Walk, don’t walk, Talk, don’t talk…

As darts commentator Sid Waddle once said… ‘You can watch BBC2 for Shakespeare but you can’t match this for drama.’

 

And so, England continues to entertain. A 3 wicket win and by 18 runs over the Windies was their part of qualifying for the quarters done – it now just relied on the others.

 

Swann said, ‘This is up there with the Ashes for raw emotion’ – A double top finish indeed.

 

Gayle smashed 43 in 21 balls before being told to take a hike and Tredwell did, with his first ever ODI wickets taking 4-48 in the process.

 

Over in the Pakistan camp Shoaib Akhtar announced his retirement after the World Cup, but of course that wasn’t before they took care of Australia by 4 wickets.

 

The Aussies had already qualified with a rout over Canada but were skittled all gone for their first time since ’99 losing their first World Cup game in 34 victories in the process. But most talk was about the Punts not walking after a nick and the commentators not talking about it.

 

Pakistan go through topping the group and play Windies, whilst England have the Srills in Colombo. Australia will play favourites India who whipped the Windies by 80 runs.

 

Others in are: Caps versus the New Dutchies, thanks to a 206 run win over the abysmal Bangles whose win over England was nothing more than a pure tantalising build-up for the entertainment stakes.

 

Quick news flash is that the Paki’s thrashed the Windies, and suddenly their dark horse is turning shades of what ever colour you like because at the end of the day they pay someone to paint it, nevertheless put your dirty money on the cheats because they’re in with a throw.

 

If fool’s mammories serve him, he recalls squeezing out 112 for the Windies with Shoaib dealing the killers blows in 43.3 overs.

 

It’s early now and… - I’m done

 

The team that likes roll mops and partying and belts and rum and temptations and feathers and Steve Finn and proverbs and coordinates and pigeons and tiddly winks and Jessie’s! And spin and the Beatles and Buddy Holly and side-show Bob and Ant and Dec and capes and japes and basketball and indoor cricket and psyche and a good rib-dig and loose ends and first balls and a good roasting, and triple tons and whoa-ha-ha’s and cooking and cradles and Yorkshire puddings…and 2010/11 Ashes, and the Gods

 

Till next week…

 

 

GTM: Probably the best set of garden and leisure furniture in the world. See the *classified section under business opportunities for more details.

 

 

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