Crazy Fool's Newsround

waiting
July, 21st 2010 18:33 PM

Educated Puns

She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

Letters: no time

Things that are really getting on my nose, up my goat and around my wick this week:

Waiting – in the immortal words from Party Party, ‘I said waiting’, which is an audible joke that never works in print unless you have the sketch in front of you or know the film, nevertheless it has really gripped my goatean gland this week, which is not a euphemism for the said joke above, that many will not get, but a state of being, as in being bastardised by a certain grievance that is attending to fool’s calming psyche this week.

If you bear with me I’ll tell you about it, which, and to hell with the lead ups and houses that politicians can go around is to cut to the chase and tell you that fool is fed up with waiting, waiting for it to ‘turn out nice again’, waiting for the kettle to boil, Waiting For Godot and most annoying of all, waiting for Mrs fool to drop the second sprog, as there’s only so much a man can take regards pregnancy.

If they’re not talking about it they’re thinking about, and that means, it won’t be long before it’s spoken about again, which is all very good, I’m not poohing the excitement of being, but it does dampen the prospects of going to the pub, no talk of sport, no and no…no, hang on, I think I’m about done there. But you get my point.

Now, I’m not tagging singular portions of the Jekyll and Hyde-ism’s that occur to a women during pregnancy on the missus alone, as the effect is paramount across the board, and to be honest, for the first it’s great; all the insecurities, the ‘panziness’ and blind panic covered up by shaking and sleepless nights, but when the second comes along it’s just ungenerous on the human race that we should have to go through the whole the whole nine yards again.

If everything else is being speeded up in our hi-tech world, what happened to birth? I think the first child should be cherished for the beauty that is birth, and to be sure, there’s nothing like it, but there on in you should get a discount card at your local hospital, much like the points system at the supermarket., where if you cash in enough points, then bam, you get the broodiness, the pleasure, the sickness, the hate, the hate, the hate, the unreasonable reason for being a human being, the love, the hate the hate the hate, the love, the unreasonable excuse for being a human being, the love, the names, the clothes, the sodding cot mattress, the clothes, the lies, the complete alien you once used to know, the love, the birth and then when it pops out the love that sprouts a new kind of love - to the point of going for a beer and it all being normal, all in a week, as hey presto the miracle of birth is on your doorstep in 168 hours flat – waiting – I said waiting - Bastards!

Things that are just Sweet Love:

The Pub

A viewer’s favourite haystacks from Bosnia – has finished – this week we are going to look at this:

Let’s look at rocks:

Ok, what else is on in cfnr this week?

See; Categories for all that’s on offer, in the meantime fool recommends these:

*cf'’s radio show featuring Digger:

Playing NOW the one with:

Snoop Dig

Plus all the ‘oldies’: Randall, Adam & Valerie, Olda Higden, One Eyed Dog, Risky Red, the long forgotten Christmas show and its Typewriting September predecessor, - new one coming soon - look out for the fish!

*Tit-bits – .../…Advice from…/……/…/…/…

*Grub–Up – * New- New – new – NEW! – Brand new menu in crazy fool’s kitchen/café – see poetry corner – nuff said

*Poetry Corner: ‘Ode to a crazy fool’s Shepherd’s Pie’

*NEW...Fishman...NEW...Fishman! – Read all the Fishman’s tails in… On The Pond, April ‘09’ – On the shelves now - may The Dog be with you

*Classifieds

*Comps and results

*Bongo Massif Bro’s – ‘…a jiffy…’

Mr. Meaner... come take a trip on the wonder why, come take a slice of my pie -

*crazy fool’s Shepherd’s Pies – available; only from the Blue Gecko

Packed with lumps and bits and things that went baa and bleat – and other things that didn’t say anything, like the potatoes – lazy gits! They’re wind free too (almost)

Buy six pies and get a free T-shirt; see the full fool’s T-shirt ‘menu’ and choose your shirt!

Plus; every T-shirt sold - $1.00 goes to charity