Crazy Fool's Newsround - sloppy polythene

sloppy polythene
October, 07th 2010 00:06 AM

FRaS

Is brought to you by

Dr. Phil Ology’s word of the week:

“Words, don’t come easy to me, how can I find the way to make you love me, oh words, they don’t come easy…”

RIGHT AS A TRIVET

Anything that is ‘right as a trivet’ is in the best possible state, because a trivet is a three legged stand which can only stand in an upright position. Therefore to be ‘right as a trivet’ is to be quite right about something.

Educated Puns

When cannibals ate a Missionary they got a taste of religion’.

Letters:

The making of a geezer;

‘I can’t eat all these chips.’ – POOF

‘It’s a bit nippy out here in it’ – POOF

‘You’re having another! Your wife’s gonna kill yer’ – POOF

‘Care!’ – GEEZER

‘I changed a car tyre in the rain today’ - Geezer

Things that are really getting on my nose, up my goat and around my wick this week:

Sloppy polythene – Asia, as we know are obsessed with wrapping everything in plastic bags, if they could individually wrap staplers they would, but cycling home from the veggies shop with one ear on the traffic and one on the confusing thud of your individually wrapped spud, carrot, and green items not as yet identified – I’m hoping its spinach – I had it, it tasted like spinach, but someone told me it wasn’t – the saga continues – but back to the hole in the bag, which is a slap in the plastic bagged fraternity of excellence that can only be described as shoddy. How often does a plastic bag split – never, it never splits at the bottom, but not only does it happen, but sometimes the handles break too – and they think they’ve got problems in – pause – where are there any problems these days? – I think the world’s at peace – but if the Mogadishu, for instance, were thinking of bringing another Hawk down then they’d think twice if they had to carry their ammo to a rooftop in a ‘Super Cheap’ plastic bag.

I contacted the world’s largest manufacturer of recyclable plastic bags in the Netherlands’s; Schoeller Wavin Systems, who have teamed up with Sweden’s Arca Systems, and now operate as Schoeller Arca Systems out of Holland, and I put it to them. I’m yet to hear. Sloppy polythene - Bastards!

Things that are just Sweet Love:

Having wood delivered to make stuff out of. (Not in plastic bags)

A viewer’s favourite haystacks from Bosnia – has finished – this week we are going to look at this:

Let’s look at fart:

Ok, what else is on in cfnr this week?

See; Categories for all that’s on offer, in the meantime fool recommends these:

*cf'’s radio show featuring Digger:

Playing NOW the one with:

Snoop Dig

Plus all the ‘oldies’: Randall, Adam & Valerie, Olda Higden, One Eyed Dog, Risky Red, the long forgotten Christmas show and its Typewriting September predecessor, - new one coming soon - look out for the fish!

*Tit-bits – .../…divorced Barbie…/……/…/…/…

*Grub–Up – * New- New – new – NEW! – Brand new menu in crazy fool’s kitchen/café – see poetry corner – nuff said

*Poetry Corner: ‘Ode to a crazy fool’s Shepherd’s Pie’

*NEW...Fishman...NEW...Fishman! – Read all the Fishman’s tails in… On The Pond, April ‘09’ – On the shelves now - may The Dog be with you

*Classifieds

*Comps and results

*Bongo Massif Bro’s – ‘…yep, one more heave…’

Mr. Meaner... come take a trip on the wonder why, come take a slice of my pie -

*crazy fool’s Shepherd’s Pies – available; only from…coming back soon

Packed with lumps and bits and things that went baa and bleat – and other things that didn’t say anything, like the potatoes – pure laziness! They’re wind free too (almost)

Buy six pies and get a free T-shirt; see the full fool’s T-shirt ‘menu’ and choose your shirt!

Plus; every T-shirt sold - $1.00 goes to charity