7th - 13th January 2011 volume 414
January, 12th 2011 21:19 PM

“When the blood was red

That’s how ya got a bullet blasted through your head”

(Rage Against the Machine)

 

 

 

You’re reading crazy fool’s  newsround – the world’s news according to crazy fool all rounded up in a weekly bundle of:

 ‘Play’, quizzes, trivia, sponsors, sport and world news – not necessarily in that order

(fresh edition brought to your doorstep every Friday morning – may contain nuts)

Plus; the radio show – with a new look!

 

Click on this logo in home page – good one this week; local lad – The One With Pat

 

Reporter: crazy fool

 

Published 13.1.11                                           

For 3rd Battalion Royal Anglian Regiment

And now let’s hear it for the news: Bong, bong, bong:

Brought to you by

 

 

Gesundheit

A man who was shot in the head sneezed out the bullet whilst at hospital complaining of a very strong headache.

 

Darco Sangermano, 28, had been revelling in the streets of Naples, Italy on New Years Eve when celebrational shots were fired skywards by, presumably Mexican bandits.

 

Needless to say, Darco took one in the right side of his head, where it tunnelled behind his eye, hit the bone of his nose and settled in his nostril.

 

His girlfriend who prefers not to be named due to in sighting bogus claims of marauding Mexican bandits on the mafia’s turf said, ‘we were walking when all of a sudden there were some bangs and he said he felt a pain to his head.’

 

Prof Sid Berrone (excellent name) who carried out the ‘tidy-up operation’ said, ‘This was a very strange case and the first of its kind I am aware of.’

 

Two other similar incidents happened that night with one resulting in fatality after a man broke wind and shot the dog.

 

 

 

Keeping it clean

No pants day was celebrated around the world this week, as participants were urged to travel on the tube in their underwear.

 

The craze, started by a bunch of New York nuts called Improv Everywhere in 2002, had just seven members to begin with. Now 3000 in 43 cities in 16 countries get on the tube minus their strides and act as if nothing is peculiar.

 

Sarah Jackson told CTV news, ‘For some reason I feel incredibly comfortable in my underwear on the LRT.’

 

- Which of course wouldn’t work with the Circus of Horrors show that was once banned from Britain’s stages because of an act which involved smoking.

 

However, having scrapped the violating health and safety sketch they have been allowed back and are seen to perform a skit where a dwarf in a kilt pulls a Henry Hoover attached to his knob.

 

 

Say cheeeese

In 1969 November’s Playboy model, DeDe Hind went up in Apollo 12 – well, a photo of her orbs did at least.

 

DeDe’s 34C’s were taped to the inside of a cupboard door stashed with hi-tech equipment, as a ground crew’s practical joke for the astronauts delight. The photo is now being auctioned for a starting price of £10,000.

 

In light of half the world’s population surveyed 50% said they wouldn’t bat an eyelid if aliens suddenly visited or indeed were amongst us already.

 

Such is our generation’s evolvement on the matter of being shocked that the notion of sending up tits on a locker door is no longer deemed risqué, so scientists are now orbiting French cheese.

 

Elon Musk, the co-founder of PayPal funded tests to supply the International Space Station by sending 12kg’s of Le Brouere in a rocket around the world… twice.

 

Why did he choose cheese? Because apparently he’s a fan of Monty Python’s cheese sketch.

 

The cheese landed safely in the Pacific and is now on a barge heading to California – thanks for the mammories, journey’s on a jet, cheese I can’t forget…!

 

 

 (Quick sponsor ad before the song that comes in the middle bit)

 

Crazy rock n roll capes No. XXXXXIIIIVVIVI! ‘The first animals flown into space were fruit-flies sent up in a V2 rocket in 1947 – both survived’

 

Take it away the song in the middle bit: (only available on website!)

 

What they’ve recently said: ‘crazy fool’s Kitchen was a ripper mate’ Seb Coe

 

Peter Kay corner – very Cooper-esque, except this is a Peter Cook quote, which is a cross between the Kay and Cooper but without the k! – Wrong, all wrong, we’re going back to 2005 and a slice of vocabulary – wrong again, we’ve done a full circle and it’s back to Tommy Cooper, but with some new one’s – keep up! ‘I visited the offices of the RSPCA today. They’re tiny. You couldn’t swing a cat in there.’

 

crazy fool’s

Kitchen

 Was a blast

 

Once again; thanks to

Anand Jagota Ensemble

&

Pat Savage

(check them out on youtube for cd’s)

 

 

www.100friends.org

 

2000THB was raised in the raffle with special thanks to our raffle prize donators:

Prego By The Beach

Surin Bay Inn Hotel

Nifty

Juice

Pacharan

Boathouse

 

And food was provided by Sa

&

 

&

 

 

Coming up soon in Phuket; PCF Race Day – on 23rd January

 

 

http://www.phuketcharity.org/pcf-race-day/

 

http://www.phuketcharity.org/duck/

 

 

 

 

 

Wanna buy a condo?

 

www.highstylecondominium.com

 

Animal news

 

*A polish farmer was arrested for drink driving this week after being found three times over the limit and with a goat in his car. By all accounts his goat was lonely so he took it to his farmer friend who had a female lonely goat. Police said, ‘They had a few vodkas to break the ice and then some more to celebrate and by the time they left with his now not so lonely goat he was very drunk.’ – Surely the goat should have been arrested if he was the one drinking!

 

*A bus driver was killed by a Siberian white tiger in China’s northern region of Haului. Jin Shijui got stuck in the snow and when he gout out to shovel he was dragged into the forest by the hungry feline. When authorities found him there wasn’t much left.

 

Number crunching

 

*A new super yacht is being built by Derbyshire based Yacht Island Design with a price tag of £700m. Themed on Monaco, the 500footer is called Streets of Monaco and houses a mini race track for go-karts, replicas of Hotel de Paris, Café de Paris, La Roseanne, Loeus Hotel and the usual bunch of pools and tennis courts. The floating city can cater for 16 guests with 70 crew, with a Penthouse on 3 floors covering 4,800ft.

 

*The Italian Job has been voted as Britain’s best ever film. The 1969 film took 15% of the votes. Second was Life of Brian with 7% and the Full Monty on 6%. Anthony Hopkins was best actor with 12% followed by Laurie Olivier and Michael Caine on 10 and 9% respectively. Judi Dench cleaned up the women’s with 25% followed by Helen Mirren on 14%. Hitchcock was the best director. What about Zulu!

 

 

I’m off – come on Pig

 

Keep it turning, keep it wheel.

 

Just cf it

 

cf

p.s. for the latest news click on crazy fool’s Radio Show – click on red icon – top left of home page – new weekly updated shows Friday afternoon’s – two in the can waiting to be uploaded – another recorded this week – knock yourself out!

 

p.p.s. sport is back – a mild, PotDQT with slight Fras showers!

 

 

 

Jaspas: Marguerite madness on a Friday is pure madness. See them in the *classifieds. There’s more on offer here that meets the eye – look out for their superb long-lunch deals – they’re long, lunchy and superb and they’re in Saigon, Vietnam! Salt ‘n’ pepper steak is a must – glug it down with a splash of Tatachilla Cabinet Shiraz

 
 
 

 

Other news