November, 10th 2010 21:06 PM
“Let me tell you people a low down thing or two”
(Muddy Waters)
You’re reading crazy fool’s newsround – the world’s news according to crazy fool all rounded up in a weekly bundle of:
‘Play’, quizzes, trivia, sponsors, sport and world news – not necessarily in that order
(fresh edition brought to your doorstep every Friday morning – may contain nuts)
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Reporter: crazy fool
Published 11.11.10
For 14th Signals Regiment (Electronic warfare)
And now let’s hear it for the news: Bong
, bong, bong:
Brought to you by
Out with a bang!
A naked coffin calendar has caused controversy in
Funeral giants Linder have once again captured semi clad females propped against their products. November’s issue sees a PVC garbed hottie in heels and stockings straddled suggestively on one coffin whilst August’s edition reveals a lady leaning seductively against an upright box wearing nothing but a G-string and a pout.
A spokesman for Bartek Linder explained each month is inspired by a film scene from James Bond, Reservoir Dogs and Godfather.
“It has a sort of
The calendar called Drop Dead Gorgeous has the church in a rage with Father Tadeusz Rybrink stating, “This is simply tasteless and shocking. Death is not sexy and the connotations presented in this calendar are disturbing to say the least.”
Tell that to David Carradine, Michael Hutchinson,
Miss December - worked to death
Take a load off
The first film showing how a women’s brain works during orgasm is to be screened at the Neuroscience 2010 convention in
‘Guinea pigs’ were put through a body MRI scanner and 30 parts of the brain lit up in ecstasy as they stimulated themselves.
For some it took only 5 seconds to raise their hands indicating triumph and others 20 minutes, yet in all cases the rapture was so euphoric it was enough to shut down the nervous system and eradicate pain.
Maggie Gyllenheed 32 stars as the woman who falls for a 19th century inventor whose machine cures ‘hysterical’ women with ailments such as anxiety, insomnia, irritability and nervousness.
Jonathan Pryce 62 who stars said, “There are humorous elements, but ultimately it’s a film about female emancipation.”
ACME snuff movies
Russian artist Oleg Mavromattes is going to strap himself to an electric chair and ask online voters to decree whether he fries or not.
The zany maestro, who crucified himself for an exhibition before – how do you do that - requires 100 votes to seal 600,000 volts for half a second and 1000 for a second and half after that till he pops.
“I just want to conduct an opinion poll, just like any normal sociology study does. That’s all.” – Folks!
And the aye’s left and right have it
Meanwhile Czech politician Ivona Fiscrova will attend her next party conference naked in a bid to secure votes.
The 24 year-old is furious at jibes she received for wearing a pink figure hugging dress at the last conference says, “My motto is; if I can help then it is my duty.”
“It’s about time people in this party got up to date with modern thinking and realised what young people want.” – Here, here.
Stand out in a crowd
What colour was it?
In the meantime if anyone has seen two locomotives and a carriage stolen from the
They were last seen heading off to a neighbouring state in
Nothing to see here…
(Quick sponsor ad before the song that comes in the middle bit)
Crazy rock n roll capes No. XXXXXIIIIVVIVI! ‘Among the billions of artists to have recorded Mystery Train made famous by Elvis in 1955 were Jeff
Take it away the song in the middle bit: (only available on website!)
What they’ve recently said:
‘You can’t give baby booze’ – Reeves or was it Mortimer or perhaps the other bloke…
Peter Kay corner – very Cooper-esque, except this is a Peter Cook quote, which is a cross between the Kay and Cooper but without the k! – Wrong, all wrong, we’re going back to 2005 and a slice of vocabulary – wrong again, we’ve done a full circle and it’s back to Tommy Cooper, but with some new one’s – keep up! ‘I was reading this book today, The History of Glue – I couldn’t put it down.’
The Boat Lagoon Marina, Phuket - Everyday Happy Hour – Indian and Western food, music, sport, Sunday BBQ by the pool – from 300bht – kids 100bht
Wanna buy a condo?
Animal news
*Rats are being trained to detect landmines in
* The bush cricket has the largest testicles of any species according to its size. They take up 14% of its body weight – that would mean a 12st man would be lugging around 1.5st balls.
Number crunching
*
*Baby Lucy Lissom was born at 20:10 on 20/10 in 2010 - in Aston near Oxon
*The largest aircraft made out of Lego is 23ft. Ed Dement 38 from Waterlooville (cracking name), Hants, UK took 9 months and 250,000 bricks to build the quarter ton scale model of 36,000 ton, 872ft USS Intrepid.
*The tallest statue of Jesus Christ has been erected in the small Polish town of
*
That’ll do Pig
Keep it wheel.
Just cf it
cf
p.s. for the latest news click on crazy fool’s Radio Show – click on red icon – top left of home page – new weekly updated shows Friday afternoon’s – this week for sure!
Jaspas: Marguerite madness on a Friday is pure madness. See them in the *classifieds. There’s more on offer here that meets the eye – look out for their superb long-lunch deals – they’re long, lunchy and superb and they’re in
Other news
- • 6-12th May 2012 volume 481 - (May, 14th 2012 15:06 PM)
- • 11th - 17th March 2012 volume 474 - (March, 17th 2012 23:32 PM)
- • 4th - 10th March 2012 volume 473 - (March, 10th 2012 20:24 PM)
- • 17th- 23rd Feb 2012 volume 471 - (February, 22nd 2012 12:56 PM)
- • 3rd - 9th Feb 2012 v470 - (February, 09th 2012 15:03 PM)
- • 13th - 20th Jan 2012 volume 467 - (January, 19th 2012 12:25 PM)
- • 6th - 12th January 2012 volume 466 - (January, 11th 2012 19:16 PM)
- • 30th dec - 5th jan 2011-12 volume 465 - (January, 05th 2012 12:17 PM)
- • 23rd - 29th December 2011 volume 464 - (December, 28th 2011 12:09 PM)
- • 16th - 22nd Dec 2011 volume 463 - (December, 21st 2011 20:22 PM)
